I don’t like public speaking. I despise it, hate, abhor it, one might say even terrified, mortified, petrified by it. Every time I need to speak publicly (and cannot avoid it), the same train-wreck pattern of a thought is coming to my mind – What if?
What if I forget everything?
What if I will start stuttering and talk nonsense?
What if I will be ridiculed by my co workers because of it?
What if I will get fired because of it?
And I can dive deeper, the longer I think and ‘what-if’ about it, the more stressed I get, and the more stressed I get the worse the what-if become. This with all the physical symptoms of stress makes public speaking not fun for me.
This always remind me from a quote from The Time Machine:
You’re a man haunted by those two most terrible words: What if?
I recently read another blog post which has a different perspective, a positive one regarding ‘what-if’ – what if I try and succeed, as a way to push yourself and take that risk. My what-ifs limit me and scare me, his what-ifs give him a push to go further. I wonder if I can change my perspective.
 As paraphrased from the movie “A Beautiful Mind“